“I've been cheated on in my past relationship, and even though it's been 3 years, I still have trust issues.
Recently, I started talking to a guy I met online and now it's has been 9months ,I've liked him since day one but never confessed. We met after talking for 20 days, and he told me he liked me. I said let's go with the flow.
He later(in initial days) told me that he has a girl bestfriend, and his girl best friend was visiting his hometown and wanted to meet him. I was okay with it but then One day I saw their pictures during a screenshare. He had his hand on her shoulder, and she was leaning towards him. Their closeness made me uncomfortable, and we had a HUGE fight. He apologised repeatedly, and said that he'll distance himself it's normal in there hometown to click pictures like this.... I asked for space, and we went no-contact for 3 months.
He wished me on my birthday, and after another 20–25 days, we started talking again. We had another HUGE fight, which I admit I initiated. I thought it was over, but he reached out after a month, apologised and asked for another chance.
I gave him one, and we've been talking smoothly for 3 months now. He said that he's changed and not talking to her or any other girl and one day I suddenly told him to screenshare he shared his screen and I found nothing anywhere, he said he is not going to do anything that gonna hurt me and if i don't like that girl he'll block her and distance himself but then I said no(I'm so dumb)He's genuinely a nice guy, and I really like him, maybe even love him, but my past still makes it hard to trust him. I don't know for sure if he's loyal. He really changed himself he is waiting for my yes and is respectfully and have zero ego when it comes to me
What should I do? Are there any red or green flags I'm missing? Should I give him a chance, observe him for another 2–3 months, or walk away? And should I finally tell him I like him?
I don't want my past to ruin something good, but I don't want to ignore red flags either. Please be honest , somewhere I love him but I don't want to be a fool.”
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Someone answered with kindness...
well first see if u feel secure around him because thats the most basic and essential thing. i think trust comes with security if u feel secure and safe ariund him trust follows naturally and well no human is perfect everyone ahs their own red flags but if his red flags are smthn that bother u then u shudnt be with him and its okay somewhere deep in our hearts we all love someone if his red flags are non negotiable leave him and take time to heal urself and move on