Someone once asked...
Someone answered with kindness...
A woman once asked me why she still thought fondly of someone who had, by any fair account, treated her badly. She expected to be told this made her weak. I told her it made her human. You rarely miss the harm itself. You miss the good years before it, the person you thought they were before they showed you otherwise, and the hope you were allowed to carry back then. Missing them isn't a verdict that they were good for you. It's proof that some part of you still remembers a version of them worth missing — even if the version that hurt you is the one that got to stay.