“Well,I'm in a relationship with this man for roughly like 6 months now and he's so intellectual and overall soft calming for me but not for others but the thing which is bothering me is like he's a rlly secure man(which he claims) but I do hve sm traumas n insecurities which did kind of strated to heal bcoz he was with me n there's more which is hve work on but the real question is whtver i do,it's js falls on a wrong ear of his as in whenever i tell him whtver is bothering me then he would assure me but then at the end,he would say tht it's js this is wht happens when ur partner is not completely either healed or secure and it does makes me feel bad bcoz this r the things which he says whenever he's arguing with me in rage n covers it up by telling me tht "You need to hear the truth" and here I'm like but at wht cost?So it's like whenever he says problematic or acts like one,and when i confront him it's either him calling me so emotional or I'm not so secure like literally whenever problems or conflicts occurs,he js tells me tht he doesn't wanna talk abt it now n then promises me tht he'll talk abt it later but tht later never rlly comes n when i confront him then he says tht "whts the point of discussions when uk wht u did(mind u thts wht I wanna know wht exactly my actions or words made u feel hurt tell me) but instead he always says this n brushes off the Convo but whts scary is the feeling which I get everytime this exact moment happens and the funny thing is whenever I feel like he did smth wrong but he doesn't rlly know wht he did so he makes me explain it but when it comes to him,he js punishes me with his silence and the major problem itself is everything has to make always sense to him inorder to be acknowledged by him n thts wht he calls being secure”
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Someone answered with kindness...
i would say that rather than being heard, the first thing that should be done is to say clearly. communication is a key only when there is a lock for it. if i say something and that just affect how you perceive things then maybe somewhere amidst some misunderstandings, my choices are responsible too. now for you, confront him once and for all