Since 2 years I have made my girl bestfriend and then itself she started dating a boy who's an extremely good friend of mine we all are in a group with few more friends . And I have anxious attachment to her. Like I don't like her romantically i just love her as a friend or a sister . I do everything in my hands for her or even go out of my way cuz I care way to much . Always listen to her problems any hour of the day always respond to her texts immediately even if I have some work to do . But the problem is if she doesn't respond I suddenly start overthinking that is something wrong or she doesn't send a reel in a few hours I suddenly thing there something wrong . And if I don't get reply in a few hrs until then my mood gets worse . So my mood literally depends on a reply and that's killing me . I also feel the same efforts don't get reciprocated . What should I do? I have confronted her about certain issues sorting that . But I really need to fix my mind about this and not het anxiously attached

Question

Anonymous Practitioner · Accepted Answer

This is from a personal experience. I'd suggest you to openly tell her about how you're feeling and take some space from the friendship.Because not taking space,will complicate the issue. Please do work on your anxious attachment style. It takes time, but I promise it gets better. Box breathing and mental reset has worked for me. Give that thought a name,let's say golu..whenever you feel that way..stand infront of a mirror and say everything is okay, golu this is not the time ,go away. Tell yourself ,this is not something I've to pay attention to now. Engage in a physical activity immediately for eg gonon a walk..your mind will calm down instantly. Wishing you the best bro!!