Namaste,

I am a university student, and I am writing this because I have been carrying certain feelings in my heart for quite some time. I genuinely need some guidance on what I should do.

My story began when I was in my second year of university. A girl migrated from another college to our college, and we ended up in the same class for a paper called "Culture and Communication" (vac).

Initially, we barely interacted. She once approached me regarding an assignment, and we exchanged just two or three conversations. Nothing particularly significant happened. However, after a few such instances, I gradually realised that I had started developing feelings for her.

I remember another incident during an examination. Since she was new to our college, she couldn't find her examination room and asked me for directions. However, while talking to me, she casually addressed me as "Bhai" (brother). Honestly, that made me a little disappointed, and I assumed that she probably saw me only as a brother or a friend. Even today, I don't know whether that assumption was correct.

After that, our third and fourth semesters passed. I never gathered the courage to approach her or initiate a conversation. I didn't even properly say hello or wave at her. I would simply see her from a distance, quietly admiring her, while keeping my feelings completely to myself.

Then came the fifth semester, probably around September.

One day, I was sitting near the basketball court while she was playing basketball with her friends. I don't know how to play basketball; I am more interested in cricket. That particular day, my friend who usually brings the cricket bat hadn't come to college, so I was just sitting there.

Suddenly, she stopped playing, came towards the pavilion/dugout area and sat right beside me.

I was talking to my friend when she unexpectedly asked me, "Why don't you also play basketball? Aap bhi khel lo na basketball."

I smiled and replied that I didn't know how to play basketball.

Then she asked me what I liked playing. I told her that I loved playing cricket.

She suggested that I could go to the other side of the ground if I wanted to play cricket. I explained that those students weren't really part of our group and that the person who usually brought the bat had gone to his hometown. He would return after a few days, and then we could start playing again.

She then casually suggested that we should purchase another cricket bat because Indian boys love playing cricket.

We talked a little more, and eventually I left.

Now, I know this might sound like a very ordinary conversation to someone else. But for me, it was an incredibly special moment. I cannot properly explain how happy I felt that day. The way she smiled while looking at me and the fact that she initiated the conversation made me feel something I hadn't experienced before.

For the next few days, we exchanged smiles whenever we saw each other, but neither of us initiated another conversation.

And now, two or three months have passed since that incident. Nothing significant has happened between us.

The biggest problem is that I still don't know whether she has any interest in me. Perhaps she was simply being friendly and having a normal conversation. Perhaps I am giving too much importance to something that was completely ordinary for her. I genuinely don't know.

But there is another important factor.

I am currently in my fifth semester, and I have approximately six or seven months left before college ends. After graduation, I am planning to move to another city for my higher studies.

I don't want to leave this chapter of my life with a lifelong regret of never even trying.

At the same time, I am afraid of expressing my feelings. I don't know whether I should text her, how I should start a conversation, or how I should eventually tell her that I like her.

I also don't want to make her uncomfortable or put her in an awkward position. I respect her feelings and would never want to force anything.

So, I have a few questions:

1. Do you think there is even a possibility that she might have some interest in me, or am I simply overthinking her friendly gestures?
2. Should I take the initiative and start talking to her, perhaps by sending her a text?
3. Should I confess my feelings directly, or should I first try to become friends and get to know her better?
4. Considering that I have only six or seven months left in college and will soon move to another city, should I take this chance or simply let things remain as they are?
5. Most importantly, how do I deal with the fear of rejection and the possibility that she might not feel the same way?

I don't want to create an imaginary love story in my head. I just want to know whether I should give this a genuine chance.

I believe that sometimes the regret of not trying can hurt more than the pain of rejection. But I also don't want to mistake someone's kindness for romantic interest.

Please guide me on how to approach this situation.

Thank you for taking the time to read my story.

Question

Namaste,

I am a university student, and I am writing this because I have been carrying certain feelings in my heart for quite some time. I genuinely need some guidance on what I should do.

My story began when I was in my second year of university. A girl migrated from another college to our college, and we ended up in the same class for a paper called "Culture and Communication" (vac).

Initially, we barely interacted. She once approached me regarding an assignment, and we exchanged just two or three conversations. Nothing particularly significant happened. However, after a few such instances, I gradually realised that I had started developing feelings for her.

I remember another incident during an examination. Since she was new to our college, she couldn't find her examination room and asked me for directions. However, while talking to me, she casually addressed me as "Bhai" (brother). Honestly, that made me a little disappointed, and I assumed that she probably saw me only as a brother or a friend. Even today, I don't know whether that assumption was correct.

After that, our third and fourth semesters passed. I never gathered the courage to approach her or initiate a conversation. I didn't even properly say hello or wave at her. I would simply see her from a distance, quietly admiring her, while keeping my feelings completely to myself.

Then came the fifth semester, probably around September.

One day, I was sitting near the basketball court while she was playing basketball with her friends. I don't know how to play basketball; I am more interested in cricket. That particular day, my friend who usually brings the cricket bat hadn't come to college, so I was just sitting there.

Suddenly, she stopped playing, came towards the pavilion/dugout area and sat right beside me.

I was talking to my friend when she unexpectedly asked me, "Why don't you also play basketball? Aap bhi khel lo na basketball."

I smiled and replied that I didn't know how to play basketball.

Then she asked me what I liked playing. I told her that I loved playing cricket.

She suggested that I could go to the other side of the ground if I wanted to play cricket. I explained that those students weren't really part of our group and that the person who usually brought the bat had gone to his hometown. He would return after a few days, and then we could start playing again.

She then casually suggested that we should purchase another cricket bat because Indian boys love playing cricket.

We talked a little more, and eventually I left.

Now, I know this might sound like a very ordinary conversation to someone else. But for me, it was an incredibly special moment. I cannot properly explain how happy I felt that day. The way she smiled while looking at me and the fact that she initiated the conversation made me feel something I hadn't experienced before.

For the next few days, we exchanged smiles whenever we saw each other, but neither of us initiated another conversation.

And now, two or three months have passed since that incident. Nothing significant has happened between us.

The biggest problem is that I still don't know whether she has any interest in me. Perhaps she was simply being friendly and having a normal conversation. Perhaps I am giving too much importance to something that was completely ordinary for her. I genuinely don't know.

But there is another important factor.

I am currently in my fifth semester, and I have approximately six or seven months left before college ends. After graduation, I am planning to move to another city for my higher studies.

I don't want to leave this chapter of my life with a lifelong regret of never even trying.

At the same time, I am afraid of expressing my feelings. I don't know whether I should text her, how I should start a conversation, or how I should eventually tell her that I like her.

I also don't want to make her uncomfortable or put her in an awkward position. I respect her feelings and would never want to force anything.

So, I have a few questions:

1. Do you think there is even a possibility that she might have some interest in me, or am I simply overthinking her friendly gestures?
2. Should I take the initiative and start talking to her, perhaps by sending her a text?
3. Should I confess my feelings directly, or should I first try to become friends and get to know her better?
4. Considering that I have only six or seven months left in college and will soon move to another city, should I take this chance or simply let things remain as they are?
5. Most importantly, how do I deal with the fear of rejection and the possibility that she might not feel the same way?

I don't want to create an imaginary love story in my head. I just want to know whether I should give this a genuine chance.

I believe that sometimes the regret of not trying can hurt more than the pain of rejection. But I also don't want to mistake someone's kindness for romantic interest.

Please guide me on how to approach this situation.

Thank you for taking the time to read my story.

Anonymous Practitioner · Accepted Answer

I think you should give this a chance, but don't rush into confessing your feelings just because you have limited time left in college. The fact that she smiled at you and initiated a conversation is a positive sign that she was comfortable approaching you, but it isn't necessarily a sign of romantic interest. You might be overthinking that particular moment because it meant so much to you, and that's understandable. However, you don't need to figure out whether she likes you before making an effort to know her. Start with something simple. Send her a casual text, talk about college, ask how she's doing, or bring up something you both have in common. Don't make every interaction about whether she likes you. Give the conversation room to develop naturally. If she responds warmly, shows interest in continuing conversations, and sometimes makes an effort herself, that's a good indication that she enjoys talking to you. Once you've built some comfort, you can be honest about your feelings without making a huge confession. Something like, "I've enjoyed talking to you, and I think I've started liking you. I don't know if you feel the same way, and there's absolutely no pressure. I just wanted to be honest." 
And remember that rejection doesn't mean you're not good enough; it simply means two people don't always feel the same way. You have six or seven months left, so don't spend all that time creating imaginary scenarios in your head or waiting for the perfect moment. Take one small step and see where it goes. At the same time, respect her response and don't keep pushing if she isn't interested. My advice is simple: don't confess to an idea of someone you've barely spoken to; make an effort to know the actual person first. You don't need a guaranteed happy ending to justify trying. Sometimes, giving something a genuine chance is enough to know that you didn't let fear make the decision for you