I’ve known someone for 1–2 years n found him hot based on looks and grown attached coz of talking daily for abt 2/3 months(he texted),but his changed behaviour, lying and no accountability have made me question the friendship. We’ve genuinely spent some good time.We barely talk now, and he rarely initiates contact. This leaves me anxious, wondering if I’ve done something wrong, whether he still values the bond?Despite feeling hurt, I still miss him.Ive completely stopped initiating contact frm my side but it hurts gang.I see him hanging with other mutuals n feel like why me then.Hes kind of self obsessed n attention prone so he wants to keep good wit everyone.Theres this mutual girl who likes him nd (who is jealous of me )nd he keeps entertaining her ,meeting her nd kinda taking me for granted,despite showing hes not interested in her n talking behind her back.There have been incidents where Ive realised he must b talking about me too to her.Hes very hot n cold typa guy.And he shows everyone of us tht hes very close to all.Plus hes not capable of serious confrontations and communications coz he may dismiss them to avoid accepting mistakes or twist stories.

Would you maintain such a friendship?what do i do if next time he initiates? And wht if he never initiates the thought of wht have i done wrong keeps on eating me bcoz hes in daily contact wit her too.

Question

I’ve known someone for 1–2 years n found him hot based on looks and grown  attached coz of talking daily for abt 2/3 months(he texted),but his changed behaviour, lying and no accountability have made me question the friendship. We’ve genuinely spent some good time.We barely talk now, and he rarely initiates contact. This leaves me anxious, wondering if I’ve done something wrong, whether he still values the bond?Despite feeling hurt, I still miss him.Ive completely stopped initiating contact frm my side but it hurts gang.I see him hanging with other mutuals n feel like why me then.Hes kind of self obsessed n attention prone so he wants to keep good wit everyone.Theres this mutual  girl who likes him nd (who is jealous of me  )nd he keeps entertaining her ,meeting her nd kinda taking me for granted,despite showing hes not interested in her n talking behind her back.There have been incidents where Ive realised he must b talking about me too to her.Hes very hot n cold typa guy.And he shows everyone of us tht hes very close to all.Plus hes not capable of serious confrontations and communications coz he may dismiss them to avoid accepting mistakes or twist stories.

Would you maintain such a friendship?what do i do if next time he initiates? And wht if he never initiates the thought of wht have i done wrong keeps on eating me bcoz hes in daily contact wit her too.

Anonymous Practitioner · Accepted Answer

don't fight or beg for attention if people want to talk to you they will and if they don't find new people, friendships are a two way street whats the best outcome here? he suddenly changes or you move on and find people that care and do give you attention. he sounds like a loser too