Someone once asked...

“I've been in a relationship for almost two years, and the same situations keep repeating. A few months ago, we had a heated argument where he called me egoistic and negative, and told me I needed to change my attitude and work on myself. He was very angry and eventually cut the call. His words genuinely hurt me because I never imagined he viewed me that way. I even asked people close to me whether they thought I was like that. My best friend said I might have anger issues, but they didn't consider me egoistic or negative. I'm willing to work on my flaws, but I sometimes feel like I'm being made to believe that I'm the only problem. Our last proper conversation was a brief phone call in July, and we've barely spoken since. It's almost been three months. He says he's busy, but I see him active on social media. I understand that people have responsibilities, but I find it difficult to understand how someone can't even take a little time to check on their partner. I did reach out once because I genuinely missed him, but the conversation didn't go anywhere. Now we're back to not talking. The confusing part is that I still miss him despite everything. Sometimes I want to text him and ask if everything is alright, but then I remember how distant he's been and how often I've felt like I'm the only one making an effort. I'm starting to think that perhaps it's better to part ways, but letting go of two years isn't easy when I still have feelings for him. I'd genuinely appreciate some advice. Am I expecting too much by wanting consistent communication? Should I reach out and ask where we stand, or should I stop making efforts and move on? I don't want to make a decision out of anger. I just want clarity.”

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Someone answered with kindness...

I would suggest break up and move on, from the looks of it, he is manipulative and not really interested in you. I would rather you miss him and leave at this stage than regret it later when those years increases as do the attraction or affection you have towards him. Because then it will be even more harder for you to leave him.

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Wandering voices — answers no one has read yet

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Another soul answered...

You can't waste your whole life just because you spent 2 years with someone. Idk anything about your relationship but instead of communicating he choose distance then from his side it's over. I think you should call him and ask directly what's going on because if he is not ready to make this relationship lively again then you can't do this alone too. So just call him and ask him, and then you both can take a decision. And about your behavior, I will advice you to start reading boundaries books ( you can download free books on the website ocean of pdf), and I'm saying this because if you start reading boundaries books, do the workbook homework then you will started to see your pattern too. Because sometimes we got so hurt that we stopped seeing ourselves as we are. And also, according to me don't ask people that if you're egoistic or negative, because as a human being we behave differently to different people, some people only get to see our good sides, some experiences both good and bad sides. And it's our responsibility to check on ourselves, if we are living a good life or are we repeating our old pattern. So I highly suggest you to work on yourself not because he said younegative and all but because you do deserve a good life, where you don't take things or say in anger.

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Another soul answered...

Do you have any hope of being in a genuine relationship? If you don't then you need to work on moving on, it's not easy or quick but not moving on is, by itself, another burden. If you have a realistic chance of improving your relationship then do it. A good thing to remember is that even if he isn't always right, neither are you. Even though he probably did much more, remember you also aren't perfect. Communication is very important in a healthy relationship but it will never be perfect because no one is perfect. It doesn't sound good though. If you keep reaching out and consistently get ignored then leave him. It's not worth your time.

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