Someone once asked...

“Im talking to this one guy and im liking him a lot like a lot . It’s just been a month and we have met 5-6 times . He came to meet me even though he has to travel 2 hrs every single time . Im liking his efforts but one thing is bothering me . Im new to this all and he had a past . This is my first relationship. He wants to kiss me everytime but i stopped him everytime and he’s saying he likes me alot and wants to hold me and show affection but im scared cause im new to all of this and I didn’t even had a first kiss till now and im 23 yrs okd btw. So i said we take things slowly and he agrees to it but when we meet he just grabs my face and starts kissing on my forehead and cheeks and im fine with it but then he asks my permission to kiss on lips and i refuse all the time . Yesterday this conversation came between us and i asked him about my favourite food color and all and he doesn’t remember anything . And later I argued with him saying u didn’t even remember my fav things and all . Then i said no sex for one year but he said when things will ho they will go in flow. I asked him to promise me . He’s refusing it and keep on diverting the topic . He said he wants to make love with me . Now im having my second thoughts on him like does he really likes me or not . I don’t know what to do . I personally likes hime a lot and it’s the only thing that’s bothering me is his lust .”

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Someone answered with kindness...

I'm sorry to say this girl but he sounds like a red flag trying to just yk pop you up. It sucks that he has to avoid the topic you're talking about and he doesn't even want to promise. Yes promise is just words but promising something important for you guys is something as a "just a promise". ig all I could say is keep holding your ground and do not give in with having se or something because he "loves" you. There will be a lot of guys who will love you without trying to lure you in with sex. You sounds so adorable and you deserve the world. I hope you evaluate your situation well if I may be wrong with my judgement. Good luck^^

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Wandering voices — answers no one has read yet

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Another soul answered...

Ig he just wants to satisfy his physical needs. No good guy wants to have sex before marriage. Giving oneself to him without a commitment is the dumbest thing one can do. He can leave you anytime when he is done, and you will bear the burden of everything. It's a red flag🚩 Don't chase him.

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Another soul answered...

Don't force yourself for anyone against your consent. I don't assume he only wants to get physical with you. He might love you as well and everyone love language is different. However the main thing you want to know here is don't make yourself guilty for not rewarding his efforts. You can acknowledge the efforts have mutual love and respect for each other. This is very serious thing any decision you make think twice beacuse you don't want regret in future. At last I would say know his intentions and check what do you both want from this relationship. Hope this helps you to get some clarity!

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Another soul answered...

So, like the thing is that first try to find his true intentions. What you've to do is that is there any lustful look in his eyes. So, when you guys are sitting comfortably, just give him some skinship which you never did like holding hands or like putting your hand on his cheek....see the look is it more on lustful side or on loving and the eyes get peaceful...try this...and if still confused then talk with him about having no experience and all see hai reaction what does he say .like does he compells you to have the physical closeness or tries to sooth you that it's okay I'm always here whenever you're ready. You'll get your answer. Hope this helps!