“I'm doing my interior designing somehow I completed my college I'll have my last exam in end of this year for this you to do internship then they will see you're performance then they gives marks . But the main exam i didn't gave so I've to give exam this time .... What happened in internships that my interest in working at job gone I'm not confident to communicate yes I've done 2 internships but I got really bad experience after the both companies I've worked they discontinued me . They insulted in front of my mom I was helpless even tho I was innocent...they say I did not improved in designing just did whatever the work was and nothing else .... I hate being in competition. I want to work for my surving not for the competition..... I'm always a lonely kid who parents support but I'm so useless dumb that I can't to proper work ...zone out quickly. Can't keep straight eye I'm scared of everything. Ik I'm going to be lonely soon but I don't want to discuss this . I ignore everything. I'm not social . I'm not confident I'm shuttering when I start to talk someone. This is really crazy I'll be 21 in few days yet so much lost ... I'm depressed from so many year it's bileen 3 years I'm takinga depressed meds the one control my mood and sleep it was not good to survive in design class or in viva exams I feel so lost that I start disconnecting with people... My mom papa worried...and I'm worried for them ....i dontwant to be successful just want to settle and have a great life a shelter and loved ones . But here I'm all lone struggling with reality... Yeah everyone says I should start for a job but the experience I got it scares me out I'm never the same . I hate it .... Feels like I should get one disease and please let me die I'm not want this or anything.”
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Someone answered with kindness...
i hear you love,
doing something which doesn't bring peace to your soul holds no value whatsoever. your loved ones may push you to keep doing it as they first hand saw how hard you worked, all the sleepless nights you spend studying to get the opportunity. we think that to achieve something, to be successful we must climb the mountain the harder way, take the longer route, that may not be true. it isn't necessary that the harder we work the better we feel. no one should ever do thing that gives them no drive. the work you do must MUST bewitch you. something that you aren't passionate about can never be the route you would want to take.
you must have other talents, please my sweet if anything don't think that you wouldn't find a way. You may only receive what you go in search for.
Hope this helps! don't lose hope