“i USED to have zero frnds like even since I was 3 I never even understoof what frnds were or how to be with them or what like I was a weird kid then like 2 years ago I got " friends " they called me their frnd but only called when necessary , never listened to me , just extra and left out I was. but then 1 year ago I realised NO ONE is going to help me I have to do it myself so I built confidence like I started shwoing my hair my face I started asking , speaking up , even when uncomfortable I did it I build enough confidence that I changed from shivering legs and breaking voice to delivering a perfect speech with no fear I changed my entire self. I changed schools like 3 months ago and now I do have frnds they include me they are kind BUT I HATE THEM like there are only 2-3 of my other frnds I don;t hate but now I am surrounded with people yet so lonely ? is this what it meant to have friends because idk ? I feel empty I got no friends even though I've got a acore grp and good frnds but.... please someone some advice”
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Someone answered with kindness...
Heyy....i know how u feel. I have had this feeling too when i was in middle school. First of all, I really wanna say that I'm proud of you and appreciate that you gained ur confidence and got out ur comfort zone to be more vocal and social. It takes a lot of courage to break that zone and step out.
And, about ur new friends....you shouldn't feel lonely when you're with your genuine friends. I can't really tell if u feel that bcz of ur earlier void or bcz of them but if it's bcz of the new friends, maybe u don't feel YOURSELF when you're with them. Maybe their company drains you? If you feel heavy or empty when you're around them maybe u don't have a connection with them. And it's NOT your lacking or fault. I hope you'll get better friends soon.