“I feel like my mental health is never really going to get better. I keep getting stuck in a loop where I'll be okay for a few months but the following weeks/months will suck and my overall performance lacks. I cant begin to describe how I feel and I don't think I can comfortably put it into words. I think I'm just looking for some reassurance”

Another soul answered...

i cant really offer you anything except for my words and for you to seek some medical help. I've been in your situation before and almost -- myself, but you know what I did? I thought about someone who I know treasures me most. and for me, its my dog. I couldnt imagine myself leaving my precious dog behind. Im not that good with words but I want to help others and try to uplift them in some way. You matter, okay? Your feelings are valid and matters. You don't have to have an answer asap. no. it doesnt work like that. your feelings doesnt work like that. Feelings are weird...cause like you said, you keep getting stuck in a loop wherein you'll be okay for a few months then you'll go back to sucking and lacking in your performances but you dont have a clear answer why. What im trying to say is dont rush yourself to think of a reason why you're feeling like that. Do something you like! for example, listening to music, drawing, dancing, singing?? anything that can distract yourself! yayayyay! I'll recommend a song for you: Reflections by the neighborhood, Cry by Cigarettesaftersex, Sweather Weather also by the neighborhood and oh i like this one fr which is Sweather Weather x After Dark :D if you want someone to talk to, i can be your listener. you can add me in insta! (@mhaeee.m) not forcing you though, just if you want some company when you think that no one's ready to listen to you. Lots of hugs to you, stranger! Wish you all the best, i love you so much and im so proud of you!!

Another soul answered...

The sun always shines through the storm eventually. Find things to break this endless loop. Things that bring you joy. New hobbies, sports, or friends are great starts.

Another soul answered...

I will tell you something real, although it may or may be not related to your case. Mental health can drift because of environmental chemicals. I say drift, not change drastically, just enough for you to experience this unexplainable shift from "toward positive" to "toward negative" and back. Others may seem unaffected. The possible chemicals are too many and may work in combination with other factors, so not easy to track. But if you can identify a particular change in your environment/behaviors that is recurrently coincident, or try move somewhere else for "vacations" when the drift begins, you may find out if there is a physical trigger behind. Not sure this will help, but it may give you an additional option.