Hi everyone. I lost my husband to suicide on September 6 of this year. He was 26, we have a one year old son, and I’m pregnant with our daughter. He was a veteran just 25 days out of the Marine Corps, and was the most loving & devoted husband and father. Being a young widow has already proven very challenging- it seems impossible to find people around my age who are also widowed. It’s crazy how much guilt is wrapped up with grief. I had to change our bedroom because I couldn’t sleep in there, and I love it now but I feel so bad. Like he’s disappointed I’ve changed things already. Anyway, life is weird and so so precious. That’s the number one thing I’ve gained from this so far. I just know we need people to lean on, and the person I typically lean on is now gone. So here I am 🩷

Question

Anonymous Practitioner · Accepted Answer

"I am so deeply sorry for the profound loss of your husband, and for the incredibly heavy path you are walking right now. Please know that changing your bedroom was not an act of betrayal or disappointment—it was an act of survival so you could get the rest you need to take care of yourself, your son, and your daughter on the way. Your husband loved you, and he would want you to be able to sleep and find comfort. It is completely normal to feel a tidal wave of guilt alongside your grief, but you are doing the absolute best you can under unimaginable circumstances. You are carrying so much alone right now, but please know you do not have to walk this path in isolation. There are beautiful communities out there of other young and military widows, like the Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors (TAPS), who truly understand this specific pain and are ready to lean in and support you. Please be gentle with yourself, take it one breath at a time, and know that you and your children are in so many thoughts tonight."