“help a girlie out plzz😭
im 23 ,india and there is a 24m and we are in a sorta of casual relationship from past 2-3 months ...we both are working in IT field ..he is sooo cute ,got dimples those cute specs aghh i just wanna eat him sometime ,bite his biceps or just wanna scratch his back with my nails iykyk, and his way of explaining things to me , way of handling things is just,talking with elders 🫠🫠
but the thing is we are somewhat incompatible bcause of our lifestyles - like he does gym/dont even drinks /smokes/even do not abuses ! like literally..whereas i on the other side😭😖 am literally a party kinda girl , totally opposite of him ,muhfat types extroverted kinda,i feel im only bad whenever im with him😭😭
he told me that he can't be in a long term relationship with me because of how different we are, so ig we are in a short term/casual relationship
but now the problem is he don't even have a dating experience in the past, so i guess he is very shy even to initiate physical touches sometimes when only when 2 of us are there
like literally his hands got all warm and sweaty inside an ac cinema hall lol when i tried holding his hands ..like forget cuddling or something more ,he wont even hold my waist ,while posing for a pic , but rather prefer to keep his hands on air pretending to touch me 😭,but it was kinda cute lol
at the same time i also know we wont be together for long but still i do like him ,and i won't regret this , its like i get those butterfly inside me whenever we both are together and those overflowing emotinos inside me 😭😵💫🥲
we had talks about everything , like im trying to make him comfortable but idk what to do im giving him time and space to open up too,like we are chatting online ,sharing each others reels too .
moreover im pear shaped girl and sometime i really do get insecure about my body ,and i think im not attractive enough for him
im planning to join gym where he goes .
i can't tell my girlies about all this because i think they get lowkey jealous? found him cute idk whatever
what to do please please help me
and yeah we are not seeing someone else”
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Someone answered with kindness...
Hey, first of all, relax, friend. Don't worry too much or be overwhelmed. Maybe I can help you out in it, as I am of same age and profession as him in India. See, I can understand this much that he's shy enough to proceed with small physical touches like holding hands and waist, as he never been in a relationship before, but that makes him more attractive, at least according to me. And as I possess combined qualities of both of you lol (I have never been into a relationship and I'm shy enough to even approach, I smoke and drink, I use abusive words, love parties) so I may be able to understand both of y'all perspective. If you really like him, then ask him once to be in a long term relationship, not just because of the butterflies you get (that will fade away through time eventually with anyone) but the way he makes you feel secure, safe, seen, loved, appreciated and understood. Check whether he's actually being shy to ask you out for a long term relationship or that he's damn sure he won't stay long enough. If both of you are really sure about not staying for long term, then I would suggest you, my friend, even if you are getting butterflies or being excited with him, don't continue it. Yes ik I'm directly judging or commenting on your personal choice, but trust me, it's best for both of you, because later on, both of you might get stuck in an emotional rollercoaster that can eventually get toxic, because y'all wanna stay together because of the overflowing emotions but don't wanna stay together because of differences in lifestyle. I think he's got heartbroken before, so much that he's not willing to risk love anymore that's why he's avoiding it. Because trust me, when an average male falls Iove, he'll try his best to adjust and make his relationship work out the best. Just try to discuss deeply and introspect these few things. And I hope everything works out well for both of you🤍
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Wandering voices — answers no one has read yet
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Another soul answered...
I will tell you to live in present. Enjoy what you have untill you can. Incompatibilty you said, you both can find middle ground. No one have perfect compatibility, we just adore each others differences and stay together. Partying is fine, but drink and smoke i don't if you do but well that's obv harmful to own health. You can quit if you want but that's personal decision. And, about your body that shouldn't be factor to judge attraction. Pear shaped is stunning equally. Just get healthy diet and join gym if you want to get strength obv.
And, physical thing you can initiate at times after his consent obv. Give him space, make him feel safe and desired. He might get comfortable with time. Moreover, don't lose your individuality in all this.