Someone once asked...
Someone answered with kindness...
Hi, I'm not, I understand that I have gone through things to the best of my abilities at the moment I faced them, but given the very limited and wrong toolbox I had gathered, they didn't yield what I wanted and correctly so. I have coercive and unfit parents that didn't make teach me anything, beat me and prevented me from experiencing the world around me. I had the possibility to escape their household 2 years ago but I kept the cycle going, without realizing, and now, 2 year later, even after changing country, I am faced with the repercussions of this choice: I developed mental illness, stopped my master studies, lost friends and didn't get to build anything. What I can say is that I changed a lot as a person, matured, and I now got help and understood what my needs are, the kind of person I want to be, but I cannot bring myself to take one final leap towards freedom. I still have to understand what my purpose/calling is, how to move coherently with my intentions, but something has already been done and I am constantly reminded to be appreciative for the steps I took and not be blind to the change.